TRANSLATION
They ask you [the Prophet] about matters concerning women. Say, “God enlightens you regarding such matters by making mention in the revelations regarding orphan women [and widows] in your guardianship that you do not give what is due to (1) such ladies while you may be inclined to marry them, (2) children who are helpless, and (3) orphans, whereas your duty is to treat them justly and with fairness. Whatever good you do, surely God is Ever Aware of it.”277
If a woman fears abuse and neglect from her husband and separation, it is not wrong to try to effect reconciliation and peace between them [by themselves or with help from others]—reconciliation and peace are better, whereas selfishness and extreme greed are ever present in the human psyche. If you do good and are conscious of your responsibility [to God and to each other], then know that God is Ever Aware of your action [and your intention]. You are incapable of treating your wives with equal fairness, no matter how much you wish for it; therefore, do not allow yourself to devote to one to the exclusion of the other that makes her unsure of her position. But if you put things right and are conscious of your responsibility, then God is Forgiving and Merciful.278
But if they do separate [in an equitable manner], God will render them free and provide for them from His abundance. God is Generous and Wise!279
INTERPRETATION
277. Discussions about women’s rights and men’s obligations to women in society, both within and outside of marriage, and fair and just treatment to women who are vulnerable because of being a widow, a vulnerable girl (because of age and circumstances), or an orphan girl have been given significant attention in the Qur’an (in a manner unheard of in any other religion) to emphasize the important of social justice, justice to women in particular, and to vulnerable people in general (such as widows, orphans, and those in weaker positions in the social order). Despite the Qur’an placing such strong emphasis on and being foremost in advocating women’s rights to inheritance, to consent to marriage, and to equal access to life, freedom, and pursuit of their own goals, women in Muslim communities and Muslim societies are subjected to abuse; are restricted from education, freedoms, and justice; and are constantly made the scapegoats for men’s excesses in social interactions.
278. One should pay particular attention to verse 129 and also verse 3 at the beginning of this chapter (surah). Verse 3 is used by classical commentators and jurists to justify polygamy in Islam, whereas it is abundantly clear from the verse preceding it (128) and this one that polygamy is more of an exception than a rule and pertains to safeguarding orphans and widows whose husbands and fathers had sacrificed their lives to protect the very emerging society in which now their own children and wives find themselves vulnerable without appropriate guardianship.
In the absence of formalized legal and social protections established and prevalent in this nascent society of the faithful, it has been stipulated that limited polygamy is allowed to continue in a societal context where polygamy was the norm, by putting a strict condition of equal and fair treatment. If such a condition cannot be met, as it is almost impossible to meet the strict sense of fair treatment and if the wife does not agree, then there can be no more than one spouse. Verse 129 also categorically states that our human condition is such that (and who should know better than the Creator Himself) we are incapable of extending such equal treatment. Taking the essence of both verses together, one should be fairly certain that monogamy is the only and preferred course of action. This is something that Muslim communities have failed to openly discuss and formally recognize, and they have failed to establish norms that bring together various elements of guidance provided in the Qur’an and the norms that have evolved in most parts of the world today.
279. Marriage as a social institution is a matter of paramount importance in the Islamic way of life, and significant attention is given to ensure that each party is aware of his or her rights and mutual obligations and that peace and justice prevails in such relationships. While constantly emphasizing the need for peace, reconciliation, and mutual goodness, Islam also left the room open for separation and divorce. Even in those situations, goodness and fairness has to prevail, and God makes promises that He will help such individuals to find better happiness if they are patient and fair in their dealings with the other party.
REFLECTION
The social order, the mutual relationship, the family role of husband and wife, and the emphasis on love, mutual respect, and fairness in the treatment of women in particular in our society are critical elements that require constant attention and emphasis.
ACTION
Each one of us needs to be fully aware of such rights and obligations to be committed to fair and just treatment of each other and to be committed to our role in society to ensure justice and to look out for those who are vulnerable and need our support to sustain their dignity, freedom, and happiness. This is a serious obligation that is lacking in our social fabric, especially among the Muslims in many Muslim countries.